Some things that we learn the hard way make us sad. Losing weight, a great deal of weight, was a major accomplishment and one that I thought would make my friends and family members happy. After years of expressing worry that I was facing an early death due to obesity and pleading with me to do something, some of those closest to me treated me as if what I had done was less-than-good. Their reaction came as a shock.

My immediate family said the attitude of these former supporters stemmed from jealousy. This may have been true, but it didn't lessen the hurt. Why can't we be happy for others' successes? Why did I have to lose some friends along with the weight?

Losing friends

It took me awhile, but I figured out why not everybody was pleased with my new healthier lease on life. Some overweight friends (and a few extended family members) didn't want me to leave their group. Although they offered encouragement when I first started my weight-loss journey, they never expected me to succeed.

After all, every year and many times a year for most of my adult life, I went on a diet. I had some success with 80 pounds one time, but gained it back, and then some. Another time, it was 25 pounds. It came back along with another 30 pounds. And still another time; and another time; and still another time. Never had I reached my weight-loss goal. Now not only had I reached my weight loss goal of 150 pounds, but I had succeeded in exceeding it by 20 more pounds. Who does that?

Some of my overweight friends could hardly stand my success. They couldn't understand how I could lose so much weight when they couldn't. Every time they saw "the new me" they were reminded of their failures. It was just too hard for them, so they didn't return my calls; didn't want to see me.

Then there were my average weight/skinny friends. They never expected me to join their group. They planned for me to always be overweight. They then would be something that I wasn't. I would be fat; they would be skinny. They liked it this way. Maybe they felt superior when I was obese. I never perceived this attitude then, but after I reached my weight-loss goal, it was the only thing that made sense. They, too, didn't return my calls; they, too, didn't want to see me.

Stand by me

Fortunately, I've always been blessed with a multitude of friends and many were truly excited by my success. They are the friends who stood by me when I was overweight and are still at my side. They have and continue to praise my weight-loss achievement. They continue to like me for who I am, as well as what my packaging looks like. They, I have learned, are my true blessings.