I got hooked on this “the best” quest when a neighbor, who had a child a few months younger than my firstborn, had her “little genius” recite the ABC’s. Dutifully, the child did as he was told as his mother treated me to a satisfied look and then smugly asked if my child knew his alphabet. What a failure I was I thought as I looked over at my happy, smiling babe as he ran around the backyard. I had to admit that he had yet to learn the letters. After she left, I decided to enter the competition. I tried for the next couple of hours to help my son memorize the alphabet. He easily recited “A-B-C,” but little progress was made on the other 23 letters. Then I had a brilliant idea. Forget the whole alphabet, I would teach him the vowels: “A-E-I-O-U and sometimes Y!” We worked on this for a week and, hurray, success! My son was now ready to go public!

I asked the neighbor over for a play date with her son. I encouraged her little guy to say his ABC’s. “That was great,” I said when he finished. Then I turned to his mother. “But does he know his vowels?” As she looked at me quizzically, I had “my genius” recite the vowels. This deflated the neighbor. My son, it seemed, had won “the best” contest that day!

That night, before falling asleep, I did some soul searching. Did I want to put my child in this competition for the long run? I already knew he was bright. Did he have to be “the best?” What a happy little boy I had. His smile and sunny spirit was a source of joy for everyone who came in contact with him. Wasn’t this enough? I knew the answer. It was time to drop out of the competition. I would help him do his best and that would be enough. As it was! He’s now 27 years of age and a successful young man…in his career…in his relationships! Also, that smile, sunny disposition and, most important, a strong dose of self-worth continues because, most of the time, he does the best he can.