I used to belong to the same club as Diane Keaton and Nora Ephron. No…It’s not a club for celebrities. The club I was in is the We-Don’t-Like-Our-Necks Club, a group for women over 50 years of age. And I’ve learned the hard way that although we were in the same club, we handled our dislikeable necks in different ways.

I first discovered that my neck wasn’t my best feature when I weighed more than 300 pounds. The reason for this discovery was because I couldn’t find my neck then. It was lost somewhere between my rotund upper torso and my over-abundant jowls.

Continue reading "Chicken Or Turkey…Both Are Foul!" »

Posted by Sandra Dalka-Prysby at 03:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

Ladies, for those of you who don't know it yet, menopause comes with certain discomforts, for example, crotch itch.

Last week, I had a bad case of this malady. It wasn't a yeast infection. Not even close. I wanted to jump out a window, pull my hair out. You get the picture. I tried Vaginol. It didn't do a thing. I bought a product called Gynecort Maximum Strength and applied it liberally. This cortisone in it had me screaming in pain so bad I had to lie flat gasping for breath.

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Posted by Lady Marmalade at 03:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I SWEAR…I’M QUITTING!
Somehow I acquired the habit of swearing when I was a teen. Four-letter words began to not only fill my vocabulary, but spring from my mouth. I don’t know why this happened. My parents don’t swear; my older siblings don’t swear, and most of my close friends don’t swear. Even the group I hung around with during my middle and high school years didn’t swear on a regular basis. But I do and I’m not proud of this (nor is my family).
I have ADD (attention deficit disorder) and swearing has been known to be prevalent with people with this disorder. But I won’t blame my mouth on this. I believe I have a bad habit and I’m working real hard to break this habit. Luckily, I have kept my swearing in check at work and in most professional/public situations. It’s at home or when I have a few drinks that I have the most problem. And I’ve learned the hard way, that even at home, I have to curtail my barrage of bad words.
I’m 23 years of age and I know better. I, however, got mad at my mother a few weeks ago and used the worst of worst words with her. (You know which one I mean!) My mother was so hurt; my father, who overheard my utterance, was furious. He quickly took me by my arm and led me straight out the front door and said, “If you can’t talk like a lady, you’re not welcome here.” It was just above freezing outside and I was in jeans and a light top. My dad locked the door on me. I stood outside shivering and in shock. I had never seen my dad this mad.
At first I was pissed (see these words just come out), but I soon realized that my dad was right. I need to talk like the educated woman I am and not like a truck driver.
(I’ve always wondered if all truck drivers swear because many times over the years, I’ve heard those who swear compared to individuals in this occupation.)
I rang the doorbell. As my mom and dad opened the door, I apologized and said I would really try to clean up my verbal act. My parents kissed and hugged me and offered to help me in this quest.
I’ve heard that it takes three weeks to make or break a habit. It’s now been three weeks and I’m doing pretty well thinking before I speak, even when I’m upset. I’ve thought bad words a lot, but, most of the time, they have been staying inside of my head instead of coming out of my mouth. I’ve learned that I like myself better because of this new-found self-control. And my family and friends likes me better, too!
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www.wikihow.com/Stop-Swearing
www.homemakingcottage.com/lady/stop_swearing.htm

Posted by Emily Prysby at 11:58 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

WINTER BLAHS!
I hate this time of year, which I call my “hate season.” I hate my clothes; I hate my friends; I hate my job; I hate living in Michigan; I hate my family; I hate my body. I hate…well, you get the picture. I’ve had this hate season—which some call “the winter blahs”—for as long as I can remember. For me, this unpleasant season ends briefly each time the sun comes out and permanently when the first buds appear on the trees. Luckily, I’ve finally learned that I can’t make any major decisions during my hate season. In the past, I wasn’t so smart.
One hate season—I was in high school—I broke up with a boyfriend just because I thought he was boring. I need someone different; some excitement in my life, I thought at the time. So this great guy—and he was great—was discarded for some unknown future prospect. I spent the remained of the first quarter of that year feeling sorry for myself. When spring arrived and I saw my former boyfriend with another girl, I really felt sorry for myself. How could I give up such a great guy!
Other poor decisions made during my time of gloom was getting my hair cut short—it looked awful; giving lots of my clothes to the poor—I really liked most of these wardrobe pieces; drinking too much alcohol—didn’t make me feel better, but worse with some major hangovers; quitting a part-time job because my coworkers were morons—I was the moron.
I still hate this time of year, but now I try to refrain from making mistakes like I did in the past. This year I’ve planned a winter-getaway to visit a friend in Florida. This gives me something to look forward to and plan for. Also, I’ve reacquainted myself with ice skating. I remember having fun doing this when I was young, and I’m having fun now. Also, this activity makes me realize that I need cold weather for this, so it’s good that I live in Michigan.
Another difference during this hate season is I’m making plans with new people—the girl at work who seemed nice (she is) and an acquaintance from the health club. New people are putting a spark into my social calendar and are making me smile. (This wasn’t something I did too often during my former hate seasons!) I have even signed up for a class to learn a new computer program. This skill will prove beneficial in my present job and is a great thing to add to my resume.
My hate season will always roll around right after the holidays, but I’ve decided to roll with it in a more positive frame of mind. This I learned lessens the blahs and keeps me from making too many foolish decisions. I only hope that spring comes early this year!

Suggested links are www.psychologytoday.com (search: winter blahs); www.womenof.com?Articles/p_1_26_04.asp; www.exercise.about.com/cs/exercisehealth/a/winterblahs.htm.

Posted by Emily Prysby at 11:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

BAD HABITS ARE NOT GOOD!
When am I going to learn that some of my bad habits can be deadly? I don’t want to learn this the hard way.
I smoke cigarettes. I know this is bad for my health and is a leading cause of death. I don’t need statistics to tell me this. My grandmother and grandfather, both smokers, died of lung cancer. My mom smokes and I hear her coughing far too often. I have even developed a smoker’s cough.
I started smoking in my early teens because I thought it was cool. Besides, many of my friends smoked so I joined them to be socially accepted. (If the truth be told, there were some in our group who didn’t smoke and they weren’t ostracized or banished by the others!) I smoked all during high school with the intent to quit soon. Then I smoked all during college with the intent to quite as soon as I graduated. I graduated more than a year ago and I’m still smoking. One of my greatest pleasures is when I find cigarette sales offering two packs for the price of one. (Cigarettes are very expensive—about $6-a-pack in Michigan.)
Now I truly need to stop this awful habit. Very few of my friends smoke. Many gave up this habit when they received their college degrees. The guys I date (and many that I don’t date) hate smoking. My mother, the smoker, hates that both she and I smoke. My doctor hates that I smoke.
I’m sick of escaping outside at work in rain, wind and snow to grab a few smokes on a cigarette. Our shivering smoking group has less and less members each week as still someone else “gets smart” and successfully gets rid of this harmful habit. (They are obviously smarter than I am!) I am planning “soon” to join the ranks of nonsmokers. It was supposed to be on January 1, but, well…
Another bad habit is my trips to the tanning booth. I know these rays can lead to cancer. (There’s that word again.)
I’m getting better with this habit with new products on the market that rubbed onto my skin give me some semblance of a tan. And bronze blusher helps, too. But still, prior to summer and prior to vacations to warm climate, I schedule visits to the tanning booth.
If my goal is immortality, or, at least, a long life, I better get rid of these self-destructing habits. When will I learn?

Continue reading "Bad Habits Are Not Good" »

Posted by Emily Prysby at 11:55 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Over the years when my guilt about my unfit body reached massive proportions, I did some pretty stupid things, such as sinking large amounts of money into exercise equipment. These pieces, which ended up cluttering my bedroom and rec room, usually went unused after the first few days. The next year the stationary bike or the stair stepper or whatever ended up in a garage sale or was passed on to a friend who was touched by guilt over her unfit body. (This guilt can be catchy!)

Then I learned a simple, natural and less costly way to get fit. I started to walk on a regular basis for exercise. Amazingly, this works. I not only got fit, but I lost weight.

For all of you who have made getting fit your goal for 2007, take some advice from me: Start walking and you, too, will discover there are benefits to this form of exercise. These benefits include:

Continue reading "Why Walking?" »

Posted by Sandra Dalka-Prysby at 03:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

Here is a problem that might be helped with some community wisdom. What have you learned the hard way about last names, especially for those of you in families where mom has one name and dad has another?

When Jeffrey and I got married, I legally changed my last name to Zeldman, but quickly realized that I needed Bickner-Zeldman as a pseudonym for professional reasons. I had been in my field so long that I did not want to lose my professional identity.

Then along came the kid, who is also a Zeldman.

It all works pretty well, except when we travel internationally, fill out health insurance forms or apply for copies of birth certificates.

Has anyone come upon a good solution?

Posted by Carrie Bickner-Zeldman at 05:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (10) | TrackBacks (0)

I don’t need a man to make me a worthwhile woman! It took me a while and some pretty hard lessons, but I’ve finally realized that being solo doesn’t diminish who I am. I’m smart, funny, good looking, sensitive, loyal and so much more. If a good man comes into my life and recognizes these attributes, I’m up to the possibility of a relationship. Until this happens, I’m not only okay alone, but I have the opportunity to learn more about the woman I am and what I need from a man.

Continue reading "Me, First...Then a Man!" »

Posted by Emily Prysby at 09:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

When people are experiencing a medical emergency, you can’t always make them change their course of treatment, even if you think they might otherwise die. This is what I learned the hard way this fall when my mother suddenly became ill.

My mom is one of the people defining the new sixty. She is fit, active, energetic and hot. When she comes from Detroit to visit me in NYC, men turn their heads on the street to get a second look at her petite figure, beautiful white hair and mile-wide smile.

You would never guess that she had breast cancer five years ago, and you would never believe that she nearly died from congestive heard failure last fall.

But she did. Over the course of several weeks in August, her lungs began to fill up with fluid and she nearly died in the emergency room on Labor Day.

Continue reading "Sick People" »

Posted by Carrie Bickner-Zeldman at 06:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (9) | TrackBacks (0)

When I was pregnant with my first child, I had some bleeding in the first tri-semester. I was worried that I was having or would have a miscarriage. I blamed myself for being in this situation. I must have done something wrong—maybe it was hanging the drapes or staying too long at work—for not carrying this baby well. I did what the doctor said. I stayed off my feet for a couple of weeks and everything turned out fine.

My daughter recently had a miscarriage. She, too, thought that she had done something wrong. After all, the word “miscarriage” implies that the baby wasn’t being carried just right. Her miscarriage came after a 10-hour car ride. “Maybe being in the car too long caused this to happen.” She was looking to me for answers. I had none.

Continue reading "“Miscarriage” Is Not A Good Word" »

Posted by Sandra Dalka-Prysby at 10:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

MAYBE IT’S TIME TO MOVE ON!

Thank God the holidays are over! Some parts of the season were great; other parts…well let’s just say I’m ready to dump all my friends and start over. I learned the hard way that you can’t always depend on your friends when they say they are going to do something.
Like usual, the holiday season was filled with lots of parties and with them, lots of aggravation. “I’ll pick you up at 9 p.m.,” said one friend who was to drive to one party, a party that both of us had told the hostess we would attend. The “driving” friend called at 9:30 p.m. to say that she decided to go to another party “because there were lots of guys who would be there.” This “friend” not only dumped me, but didn’t even take into account her RSVP to the first party. (I went alone to the original party and had a great time!)
Another party and other arrangements with still another friend. I agreed to drive to this one, a dinner party. I was to pick up my friend at 6:30 p.m. and I was on time. My friend wasn’t. She had yet to decide what she was going to wear. At 7 p.m., the time the dinner party was set to begin, I was still in my friend’s bedroom watching her trying on one outfit after another. I was embarrassed when we arrived at the party an hour late. The other guests were already seated and eating dinner. My friend gave some lame excuse while I fumed inside.
Then came New Year’s Eve. Although I had received a couple of date offers, I decided to bypass having to give midnight kisses to either of these guys for a night with good friends. My close girlfriends and I would go to a party together. This was the plan. Then one by one each of my friends decided on last-minute dates. Each one expected me
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to ‘understand” when they broke plans with me. What I understood was that they were thinking only about themselves. Although days earlier they had professed that they didn’t want to be with some random guy just to have a date on New Year’s Eve, all three of them did exactly that. Again, I went to the party alone and, luckily, had a great time.
On New Year’s Day I told each of these friends that they had let me down. All expressed that they were sorry and said it would happen again. But it did. A week later agreed-upon plans were changed, altered and re-arranged to accommodate these selfish young women just because some men called and offered other plans.
That’s it. I’m now ready to move on from these friends, or, at least, to take a break from them. I’ve learned that I need to have girlfriends in my life who are true to their word…no matter what! Plans shouldn’t be changed just because some man calls at the last minute and asks for a date. I’ve learned that men seem to be like women even more when they won’t change plans when they call at the last minute. I just wish my girlfriends would learn this, too.

Posted by Emily Prysby at 10:05 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I did it again! When will I ever learn? I entered still another contest, this one online, and “amazingly” I was a third-place winner. I won a $300 certificate for facial laser treatments! I was excited. My moustache and chin hairs needed work. Maybe I could get even get my eyebrows done. I could get a whole bunch of these nasty little unwanted growths removed permanently. I could put away my magnifying mirror and be less traumatized by the flaws that my reflection showcased. My tweezers would become a thing of the past!

Continue reading "I’m A “Winner”" »

Posted by Sandra Dalka-Prysby at 07:47 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)